The Drunken Leprechaun's Ode to Beer - [Matthew]

Maybe I'm paranoid, but I don't think so.

I believe there is an international consortium of leaders, owners of major companies that manufacture adult beverages. This group secretly convenes each year to create 'holidays' which exist solely as an excuse for people to get hammered.

Doubt me? Consider these three points...

1. Mardi Gras
2. St. Patrick's Day
3. Cinco de Mayo

Seriously, these are not normal holidays. Halloween, you trick or treat. Thanksgiving, you eat until you pass out. Christmas, you go into debt. These are respectable holidays.

Aw, who cares? Here's a poem for you to help celebrate St. Patty's Day:


The Drunken Leprechaun's Ode to Beer

Oh glorious beer, Oh frothy pint
With body gold and head so white
Please don’t make me pick a fight
And help me be witty on Ladies’ Night

Oh glorious beer, ‘neath heavenly foam
Don’t let me pass out too far from home
And if I am rude as I drunkenly roam
Don’t let them harm this wee beer-buzzed gnome

Oh glorious beer, Oh frothy pint
Bestow on me thine amber light
Give me slurred speech and blurry sight
I know I’ll hug the toilet tonight


Slainte!

[end ping]