The Merry Monk of Monkey Love - [Erik]
It seems that my confession on last week's Etcetera has given many of you the courage to admit that you too have a problem. I know now that I'm not alone in my affinity for robot monkey heads. Thank you to those of you who have contacted me and shared in our common struggle.As a result of the overwhelming response and obvious need, The Quartermexican and I have started an online support group in the comments for this post to help you overcome your robot monkey head addiction. I pray it will become a place of healing.
What's more, we're proud to announce that world-renowned former monkey lover Charlton Heston will be our spokesman and leader as we seek to put our past behind us and get on with a healthy, well-balanced life free of damn, dirty apes.
Labels: etcetera, robot monkey head, support
posted by Etcetera at 12:14 PM
11 Comments:
Far too long have I suffered in silence. Several times in church, when the pastor asks us to write our toughest sins to overcome, and the walk down the isle to nail them to the cross, I have written down: "Monkey Loving" on my note card. Today I have deleted this and this from the favorites on my computer. Pray for me.
That's so funny...I mean sick...I mean...I can relate.
We will pray. I'd lay hands on you, but I'm scared I might catch something.
Maybe this is proof of evolution. What do you say to that Hugh Ross?!
I've actually asked GOD why he didn't give people opposable toes. I really love.. er, have troubles with those opposable toes.
Hello, my name is Chase, and I'm a Monkeyphiliac. It started out innocently enough, but the peer pressure got to me. I finally hit rock bottom and decided to get help. I have been simian-free for about a week now and i am just trying to live day by day. thank you.
ps...whatever you do, do NOT go to my myspace page and look at all the pictures i have there...If those pictures get out, I can never run for public office...
Without sick losers like you guys, I wouldn't be able to make a living as a chimp pimp.
Quit living in denial. People like you need people like me.
By the way boys, here's the latest addition to my stable.
This confessional's big enough for Monkey Pimps, too...is there anyone who would like to confess? Just slip your hand in the air...all eyes are closed, all heads down, nobody's looking around...yes...thank you, I saw that hand...
--Pastor Zaius
Pastor Zaius, Pastor Zaius.
Pastor Zaius.
Pastor Zaius, Pastor Zaius.
O, o, o Pastor Zaius!
Zeke, what kind of proctor and gamble experimant freakshow did you get that picture from. Are there more?
The ladies don't look like that when I get them off the trees. I have to give them some class.
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